Sunday, October 10, 2010
The problem with being noise sensitive
I'm noise sensitive. Little noises irritate the heck out of me. I can hear people chewing from rooms away. Gum snapping? You gotta be kidding me. Clipping your nails? Sends me to the moon. Random tapping? Uh...NO.
So, where's the problem, right? I'm the mom. Maybe I've got to put up with some of hubby's noises, but I sure don't have to listen to kid noises. I just ask them to stop whatever noise is irritating me. But the problem is that I model the behavior that my kids adopt. I teach them, by my behavior, that they don't have to accept somebody making noises that irritate them. I teach them to say "Shhh...that's irritating me" everytime I say "Shhh...that's irritating me". And when you've got 4 people saying "Shhh...please stop making that noise", it turns out that EVERY noise is irritating to someone. Do we really have to live in silence? Is it not okay for a person to hum a little ditty if they feel like it? How do I tell the kids that they can't keep asking everyone to be quiet when I get to tell people to be quiet whenever I feel like it?
It's not that I believe that children should have all the rights that parents have, 'cause I don't. There are definitely times when I think a parent gets to tell a child to be quiet because they are being irritating. But I also don't think I want to be the kind of parent that says "do what I say, but don't think it is a nice way to behave to others".
But...I don't my kids going over to someone else's house and making annoying noises either. Somehow I have to find a way to differentiate legitimately annoying noises (that must be stopped at all cost) and normal annoying kids behavior (which I need to learn to live with) so my kids can actually have a life without being told to constantly "be quiet" by their siblings.
I need to say that to myself again. I need to learn to live with annoying kid noises without telling them to be quiet. No more falling to the floor with my hands over my ears because my kids are humming the theme song to iCarly.
This may be a work in progress.